Category: General Article

Law/Legal/Attorney

Tips for Educating Children without Violence

Research shows, many parents actually do not want to beat their children, but do not know of other ways that can be used to give a punishment (punishment) to children. Recent research conducted by the Family Research Laboratory shows that hitting children teaches children to use acts of aggression and violence to solve their problems. Beating children only teaches more violence that is troubling the public. This research shows that children who are hit are more susceptible to Stress. So, for the sake of our children’s future, do the following things instead of hitting:


1. Calm Yourself
If you feel angry, uncontrollable emotions and you want to beat your child, leave this situation if possible. Calm down and quiet. Amid this silence, we will often find alternative solutions to the problems at hand.

2. Find Time For Yourself
Parents are more prone to hit if they do not have time for themselves, feel rushed and run out of energy. So, it is important for parents to use a little time for themselves, for example: sports, reading or relaxing walks etc.

3. Use Good But Firm Action
The frustrating situation that makes parents tend to hit is when children do not want to listen even though we have asked for it many times. Finally, we are impatient and beat our children with the aim that our children behave appropriately. Another solution for situations like this is to align our posture with our child (by bending the battery for example or squatting), making eye contact, touching the child gently and telling him with a good but firm expression what we want from our child to do. For example: “Father / mother ask you to play quietly huh … Dad / Mother is working!”

4. Give Options
Giving a child a choice includes a good alternative rather than hitting. If our child plays food at the dining table, ask “Do you prefer to stop playing with food or prefer to leave the dinner table?” If the child continues to play with food, use strict action but is good by helping the child get off the chair and leave the table. Tell him, he can go back to the table if he is ready to eat without playing food.

5. Use Consequences Logic
The consequences are logically related to behavior that helps teach children responsibility. For example, our child breaks the window of a neighbor’s window and we punish him by hitting him. What do our children learn from this situation? He may learn not to do this again, but he also learns, that he must hide his mistakes, blame others, lie or just try not to get caught. He might also decide, that he is bad or feels angry and revenge on the parents who hit him. If we hit to punish him, but do we want our child to be good because of fear or because of respect for us?

Compare if a child makes a mistake such as breaking the window
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The Right Way to Deal with Husbands Who Frequently Do Domestic Violence

Knowing a partner has the potential of domestic violence is to look at behavior during courtship
Domestic violence (domestic violence) may be some couples often do it. However, what if domestic violence is carried out by the husband continuously. This is certainly very troubling, especially for those who already have children. For this reason, you should know the previous special characteristics of a husband who has the potential to commit domestic violence.

Special characteristics or the potential for violence to the partner can be identified by the characteristics of behavior such as, once or perhaps even violence against a partner during dating, both physically, psychologically, economically, and sexually.
Accustomed to drinking liquor, using drugs or gambling, is an activity that can trigger violent behavior so it must be very cautious. Having behavioral habits that tend to be rude, temperamental, blaming others, tend to be easily suspicious so that controlling overseeing the activities of couples excessively or unnaturally, tends to demand other people do things as desired, and the tendency to be excessive possessive.

The way to find out if a partner has the potential for domestic violence is to look at the partner’s behavior during courtship. Whether during courtship, your partner has shown it. If these signs begin to appear, then try to think more openly and critically.


“Pay attention from time to time, whether your violent behavior continues to be carried out by your partner? Does the action have the potential to become more aggressive and intense violence. If so, then it’s time to ask yourself, whether you want and are able to live with people those who cannot respect you, do not love and make you feel threatened? Don’t be too sure that you will be able to change your partner, because basically someone wants to change because he himself wants and is not forced. Besides, try to involve third parties (parents, friends, friends) that you can trust to help evaluate your partner’s behavior.


If too often the wife gets violence, of course the wife’s psychic will be disturbed, the things that can be done by the wife who experiences psychological violence, namely the first time it needs to be done is to get out of the circle of violence. If you cannot do it yourself, it is advisable to ask for help from the closest person or institution that specifically helps victims of domestic violence


To overcome this psychological impact, of course you can ask for professional help like a psychologist. Women who become victims must give themselves an understanding that they are not worthy of violence. Change the way of thinking that is not appropriate in assessing whether or not the violence is experienced. Even if (maybe) there is an error made by the wife, still violence is never justified. In other words, women who experience violence must dare to tell themselves that, “I don’t deserve violence.”


“Don’t let the self-concept break down or change negatively. Sometimes victims of domestic violence have wrong thoughts that make
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